changes or when it rains, it pours.
scattered thoughts here-expect poor grammar, rambling sentences, redundancy and general panic.

not, it's not raingin here, althought they thought i might.
ug. had a mess up with my checking account again. i must be worse at math than i thought. i keep getting overdrafts every few months. yuck.

just when i think i had it sorted and could relax, today i had a little meeting with the big bosses at work. the jonesboro division is closed as of tomorrow.
oh, i still have a job. i'll be needed to help shut this one down completely over the next few months and i've been offered to relocate to the conway division...

but i'm scared.
that is the emotion, i'm feeling isn't it? i just realized. i couldn't figure out what it was, except for indecision and apprehension. oh, and panic, too.
it's not the way i planned.
see, i thought ken would get a job, be there a few months, then i could move out there and work on either getting a new job or going back to school.
this complicates things.

i'm thinking of the marx bros. quote: "why have things simple, when you can have them complicated?"

it seems to be the story of my life.
hmmm. options:
go back to school(need money for this)
move to KC/Lawerence and see if i can find work there. (could use some money for this too while i hunt for work. i could bunk with jo until she got tired of me...)
try to find something here and risk not being able to make rent/car payment, etc.
take them up on the offer (which i'd rather not do unless i have to,)
or
something i haven't thought of yet.

oy. i need to talk to ken. 8^(
i've already talked to mom, but i need ideas. mom can only give comfort, which is important, but i need ideas, too.

i always wanted to leave this place over the past year, but not like this. *sigh*

my portfolio hasn't been updated since i got this job. i don't think i have much here that would qualify as being good enough to add to my portfolio. i need to update my resume! i hate job hunting. Acck!

ok, i need to calm down and just try to find the direction i need to go in. prayers are helpful.