sketch
i drew some last night. still thinking about relaunching blue canary. i've been working on story on and off for the past few months and i feel that i'm finally getting ferdinand's history down.

strange days
Friday was weird. It all started at work. I don't know all the details ( and really don't want to know,) but one person no longer works here.
It seems rather secretive and stiffling here at work now. perhaps it will pass. as long as it doesn't effect my job, i'm not going to be to worried.

visited with Caroline some yesterday. We watched "Return of the King," as she graded papers.

Last week, mom renewed her cell phone contract and added me onto it. i'm trying to learn how to get new polyphonic ringtones. it seems that i can only get the first few seconds or Kb of a ringtone. it's annoying. grrr. perhaps i'll figure it out soon. i did manage to succeed with small ringtones that i use for text messages and such. now, every time mom sends a message, i get the puzzle solved fanfare from "the legend of zelda." i'm such a geek. 8^)P

ken's still doing well at school, but each days just makes us miss each other more. if i couldn't talk to him on the phone, i think i'd be bonkers by now.

woah! it's dusty in here!
heh, guess it's been awhile since i posted. opps.
let's see... a recap of what's going on:

• i've moved to a better, but a bit more expensive apartment. it's worth every extra penny, tho. been there for a month now.
• ken's moved away to Oklahoma for another college degree. *wah!* i miss him! he'll be gone a year and i won't get to see him except for holidays.
• jo's in germany for a year for her master's degree. *wah!* one of my best friends moved, too! seriously, though, i do hope she enjoys her stay and learns what she needs/wants. wish i could go back to europe.
• still stuck in same job. 8^P nothing new there. but it looks like i might be creating some advertisements for one of our customers...we'll see.
• c got a teaching job! way to go, caroline!
• hilary got a new puppy! he's so cute! if i could have a pet, i'd dognap him for a day or two. not forever, tho. that would make hil very sad.
• tim has quit his retail job for a very cool newspaper layout job. yay, tim!
• one of my bosses has comissioned me to make some bracelets for her. she's going to give them to her family for christmas.
• dave's back to working at the old comic shop, since that fiasco with Legends. it got sold, then a buyer dropped out. the others came to store and wanted to cart everything away. the police were called. it was messy. but at least dave's not out-o-work. and maybe this time things'll be better at the old shop.

i think that's pretty much everything... i'm trying to redirect myself to work on my comic once more. for some odd reason, fanfic that never gets written and never will, has flooded my brain. i'm trying to drain it out so i can get back to my characters and do original stories. i may restart blue canary again from scratch. i won't change the characters, tho. hmmm...blue canary, mark II...

and there's still things i need to fix on blue canary's website. argh! will the insanity never end. also i need to learn how the new code works at nightgig so i can set up a blue canary mirror site.

closed

yesterday was payday, that glorious day when i have cash in my hand,
mind it may not be there by the end of the day, but at least it was
there for a little while.

i decided to go the new comic shop after work to clean out my file.
however, this was not to be for i was greeted with a grisly sight upon arrival.
the door was papered over and locked. all the lights were off. on the
window a notice read something like this:
"legends has moved to ?"

last week, i heard the owner talk to someone about selling the place.
well, someone or some three bought it only one backout at last minute
and the owner refused to give the money back. three days ago, the
other two showed up and claimed they owned the place. the now former
owner called the police who basically divvy up what was who and then
the shop door was closed and the locks changed.
poor dave, the guy who worked there is now out of a job.

*bawls*
and i liked that place! there's stuff i had on order, too!

so much for a good thing in this town.

that was my downer for the day...until then i was happy that i was
finally moving to a better apartment. the rents quite a bit higher,
but i won't have to worry about vermin, leaky rooves, staticiky phone
lines, electrical shorts and a landlord that won't spend the money to
take better care of his property. i officially move on the 15th.

the night before i found a slug in my bathroom. that's right, a slug.
i scooped it up in a plastic cup and placed it outside. (i was mad
enough to salt it, but ken asked that it's life be spared since slugs
don't hurt anyone.)

oy. i have lots of packing and cleaning to do.

i can ride!

thanks to ken's help, i now can ride my new bike. i enjoy it. now, if only i could figure out the speeds...
i guess if i get used to changing gears on a bicycle, learning to drive a standard transmission car would be no problem. 8^)

mom's overjoyed that i finally learned. she thinks that if i learn how to swim, too, that i'll be all set.

bicycle! bicycle!

i was talking with dad and carter yesterday after the father's day dinner about how i would like to learn to ride a bike. i was never really interested in it as a kid. i never got past training wheels when my bike vanished (whether it was stolen or i gave it away, i can't remember.) then i got a pair of roller skates. i loved those skates. *sigh*

later, as i was visiting ken, i get a call from carter. he and dad had just bought a bicycle for me, a light blue mountain bike. the following photo is courtesy of carter. isn't it pretty?!


it's got 15 speeds. oy. 0_o
and i haven't even mastered the lowest speed, much less keeping my balance and pedalling at the same time! dad and carter showed me some pointers. i nearly crashed into a tree after dad thought it'd be a good idea if i went down the side of the storm cellar to gain momentum. mind you, it was a sapling, but even if i didn't miss it, it shouldn't have caused too much damage. after that, i packed up the bike and took to ken and so he could give me bike riding lessons. i nearly fell a few times! i think the bike seat left some bruises on my butt!

i'm learning. when i fall or mess up, i get back on. i'll get outside with it today after work and try to keep my balance on it with keeping my feet off the ground as much as possible. ken thinks that if i master that, i'll be more than ready to add the pedals in. pedaling is easy but keeping you balance at the same time is the tricky part.
i'll have to get elbow and knee pads soon, not to mention a helmet. wish me luck!

happy b-day to me!

i'm offically 27 today.

dad and carter took me out for dinner for my birthday last night and mom's taking me out tonight. 8^)

it's still early yet, but things are shaping up to be a great birthday. no party, no cake, just food, my parents and brother. if ken didn't have to drive so far, he'd be here, too, but i'll get the see him tomorrow anyway. 8^)

lazy weekend

it turned out to be a pretty uneventful weekend. thank you, God!
they didn't need me on saturday to work, but i carried my cell phone with me the entire weekend. they never called on sunday either. *shrugs*
i still had to come in early today. no holiday for the kit.

i mostly spent the extra time with ken. 8^)

we saw "Troy" on friday evening and just hung out in general.

ken and i were searching through flea markets in paragould on saturday, just to kill time. that's when i found my birthday present:
one 2-drawer lateral file cabinet in great shape and the price was a steal! normally those things are so expensive...
and 2 old boardgames i had never heard of, The Inventors and Shogun. They even had all their pieces!
i've gone game crazy. i went to ebay and placed a couple of bids for some old games that looked like fun. one is Whatzit? which we played in my creativity class in college. i loved that game... 8^)
i'll have to be careful that i don't blow all my money on books and games.

we got caught in a storm on sunday. we were just sitting in wastings, reading books, when the power went out. they let us out of the store eventually.

after work on monday, i went to visit ken and his folks. ken was grilling some pork ribs, wet and dry. i prefered the dry myself. they were some of the best i've had yet.

ken and i have fun but we're not what you'd call party people. lol! 6^) and that's fine by me.

going live-card games-fluff

well, this is it. the new computer system finally goes online in a couple of days. and i think the majority of my tests to make sure that the customer invoices print properly with the newly designed form are complete. only one small changes to make to the form and that's it. for now, anyway. please cross your fingers and pray that i don't have to work all memorial day weekend.
----------------------------------------------
last night i finally found some folks to play chez geek with and i learned how to play munchkin. good times. thanks for out to dave and the gang for inviting me to dinner and to the gaming group at ron's for playing chez geek with me.
and thanks for loaning me the book, ducker(is that how you spell it? i'm bad with names.)

btw...it's time for,
A Fortune Cookie Moment!
"Be content with your lot. One cannot be first in everything.
11 13 28 33 41 - 25
11 25 30 34. 0 5 6"

i sat next to dave's little girl at dinner. she's six and pretty sharp. i'm reminded of jo whenever she met a precocious child, "she's just so precious." and little miss mina draws quite well i hear. i'm looking forward to seeing her art. 8^)
----------------------------------------------
sad news though. it looks like fluff, the demon cat, has died. he wasn't doing too good last weekend and on tuesday, he just went off into the woods and hasn't returned. ken and his folks don't think they'll find him. even though fluff was violent, mean and liked to inflict pain in others, ken genuinely liked the furball. i was even able to pet him a few times without getting bit or scratched. and he liked puppies; he'd play with them, not even biting or scratching unless he had to.
R.I.P. fluff, to the cat who liked dogs but hunted all cats down and gave them a daily thrashing. things will be less interesting without you.

library and stuff

made a trip to the library this friday. i paid my overdue fine *o.o* and got some new books. mostly i went to look at Alice Lynch's daredevil quilts. that's right, quilts. they are even approved by David Mack, the current writer of the book and creator of Kabuki.
She did a good job on the quilts, too. they are more like fabric collages than blankets. mind, they'd be small blankets. you can see some here, if you're curious.

i also made a trip to the new comic shop this weekend and learned a new game, guillotine. strange but cute game. i'm going to have to get a copy. i unearthed my copy of chez geek now that i might have some people to play it with.

testing e-mail posts again

just to be sure...
i'm trying to post to my blogs my e-mail again. i want to make sure it works.

testing e-mail posts

testing e-mail posts
i'm trying out the new stuff.
so let's see if posting by e-mail works. 8^)

new comic store

a new comic shop opened by my house. i'm going to start patronizing this one big time. the other one never ordered stuff when you wanted it. 9.9 i'm actually pretty excited about the place, not only can you get your comic fix and play some games, but it's a great hang out spot. i think i'll go there a few times a week with my drawing supplies and try working on a comic there.

working da weekend
well, since our new computer system goes like on memorial day, i've just learned that we will be doing tests that weekend, so guess who has to work...me!

at least i'll be getting paid for it.

lookie!
ken's got some new art up on his website. some of his best stuff yet. 8^)

strange dreams
i woke up an hour before i was supposed to this morning. i rolled back over, went to sleep and had a odd dream...

at first, it was like i was watching a documentary. these people would take things (i don't know or remember what they are) through a gate. i think the gate was like an entrace to a city or something...
the people were sitting in the bed of an old, old pickup, and holding objects up. the best way to describe it was like hunks of cow meat (like sides of beef, but it wasn't recognizable as meat.) or large pieces of pink insulation. i got the impression that you could eat the objects they carried.
the people were all women. though the truck was an old style body, it was red and shiny, like new.
the things they'd take through would expand in size as it went through the gate...the people were dressed for 1940's factory work, dusty coveralls...boots, hair up in nets or caps.
one in particular was a blonde girl with a short hair cut, flapper style.

flash forward. the stuff in the gate was some sort of radiation and an old woman was the blonde girl. don't ask me how i knew that, i just did.
she had just been through the gate again, this time in the car with the rest of the family. it was like she was my grandmother, but she looked nothing like either of my grandmothers. though frail with age, she was tall. she walked in the house and sat heavily in the first chair she could find...she was exhausted and was thinking that going through the gate did it.
i remember at this part of the dream she actually did become my grandmother...

next thing i know, i'm in a house i don't recognize, but i know it belongs to family. i can't remember who was with me but i want to say it was dad and carter. dad was watching the news and told me to come look at outside.
the sky was dark, like an impending storm, full of gray clouds, but one was radically different. it grew up, into the sky, becoming a mushroom cloud. apparently the news was about nuclear missile strikes.
i remember becoming panicked. first thing i thought or said was, "i gotta call granny." i grabbed the phone, i don't remember if i dialed or not, but i was thinking of who else i should call before the shockwave and e.m.p. hit...ken, of course, instantly sprang to mind. i also thought i should call mom and let her know.

and around there i woke up. weird, huh?
i remember thinking that it was odd that i wanted to call granny, for both of my grandmothers had been deceased for some time now. i can't, however, recall if i thought that in the dream or if i came to that realization upon waking.
it makes me wonder.

grover sent a few pages on the blue canary story he's been working on. he's helping me finish the current storyline.
of course, this is just a first draft, so things do need changing, but i'm glad he finally sent me the pages.

the big boss is here again this week for more last minute training before our new system goes live next week.
i'm impatient to get the invoice and stuff done, but we'll see how fast the programmers work so that i can do my job.

ken's working more on nightgig again. 8^) he mentioned that someone was working on an automation code for the site. when it's done i'll make a blue canary mirror on nightgig.


addendum: the date for going live with the new system at work has been pushed back to the end of the month. *whew* that's a relief.

greenery


this is the plant dawn gave me.


and this is what the folks at work got me.

flowers definately aleaves any grumpy feelings towards my job, at least for awhile, anyway.

stuff
the pressure has calmed down some at work. thank you for prayers and thank you, God!

the food show was last week. it went smoothly, i thought. they had me working a booth. that was odd. i made out like bandit with free samples, though. however, i was not as bad as some of the customers...they would have 2 bags or more just full of whatever items they could put in it. 0.o
at least i wait until the show is over before i try to raid the booths.
one poor lady had an entire display of candles taken from her booth!

i'm working on designing a purchase order at work now, when i'm not working on the invoice. who know's when we'll resume work on the pricebook.

and it's administrative professional's day at work, formerly secretary's day. i was presented with a cute plant from dawn, a bouquet from the company and a little gift bag full of goodies from my boss, linda. so that's cool 8^)

when i signed into blogger, i was asked if i wanted to beta test google's new e-mail. while i've heard some controversy over the way google searches the contents of it's mail for better ad placement, 1 gig of space isn't something to shake a stick at either. so i'm trying it. if any real life friends wish to send something to me at that account, please contact me on my yahoo account first so i can send the new addy to you.

frustration

by now i would expect the folks at work to know that i can meet a deadline, but since the big boss wants this invoice redesign to be live by the time our new computer system goes live, i get pressured. he's got my immediate supervisor on my case and today it's really grating on my nerves.

right now, most of what i need to do has me waiting to hear back from computer programmers from two different companies before i can make progress. o.0 when i get bored, i try to find another project to do, only to get nagged at that i should put that down and work on the invoice, the one project where i can't make progress until i hear from other people. it's enough to make me go postal, (but i won't. i need the rent money.)

someone there though must have sympathy for she showed me a classified for a local graphic design position. if i get a job offer and it at least matches what i am currently earning, i'll take it. no second thoughts, no regrets. i'll be working on the resume tonight.
need i also mention that i haven't had a raise in pay since that first 90 day trial period when i first started 2 years ago...*grrr*

i've had it up to here with someone at work thinking they gotta hold my hand to get a deadline met after i've been here for two years and have yet, to my knowledge, to miss a deadline.

scratch that

now, i have seen everything.
i was doing some research on google for work and i noticed all the new stuff they recently added. like a language translator and google in different languages, including...pig latin, klingon, elmer fudd and bork bork bork? (think swedish chef) 0.o

the elmer one is pretty funny and is my fav so far.

ascii
because of this, i have now seen everything. thanks, ken.

con report
is now online at my blue canary blog. Thanks again to jo for helping me to get the posts to show.

the con was great fun. i enjoyed myself.
after the con, ken and i went to the art center and i finally purchased an art desk! 8^D
afterward, it was dinner at the chinese/vietnamese resturant, pho hoa binh (pronounced foe wah ben.) good food! first time i've ever had general tso's shrimp. i want to go back and try their phos (soups.)

fun event and web design woes
i'm going to MidsouthCon tomorrow. i'll post a con report on my new Blue Canary blog...if i can get it to actually show the posts, that is.

in the meantime, that blog's new design is up. thanks to jo for the lovely job of design and coding. i think i'm the only person i know who art directed their own blog (or blogs, jo's working on my other two, also.)

i made some progress with Blue Canary's new site design. i loaded it tuesday and messed it up worse, but now the correct design is up and most of the images are showing on the main page. i still believe the archives are down and i know the other section sof the site are...don't know why, though. guess i need to look over the code again. hopefully, ken can look it over tonight and work out a few bugs.

mural
i never posted my latest post-it note mural. i did this back in september. enjoy.

movie
mom and i saw "passion of the christ" last night.
some things made me think, some things made me wonder about why gibson chose that specific imagery and through it all, i thought, "how much abuse can one person take?" I almost couldn't stand to watch the beatings...

is it a truly accurate portrayal of what really happened?
dunno. no one can possibly be know now...all that saw it are long gone, and the bible has lost things in translations from greek,latin and hebrew so that some meanings are lost and some meanings manipulated by our fellow men to cement their grip on power.

it does make me think.
like, if God knew what was going to happen before he made Adam and Eve, then that means that Judas was condemned before he was even born. What happened to free will?
Did God harden Judas' heart like He harden Pharaoh's during Moses' time? and if He did, isn't that meddling with the free will He gave us? Part of me wants to yell, "that's not fair," but since free will entered the picture, life is not fair. Free will is why bad things happen to good people.

religion isn't supposed to be easy, isn't supposed to be cut & dry, simple to understand & follow. i believe, and anyone is welcome to disagree with me, that we were given free will so that we would come to God and learn to love him by our choice and not because God made us to. I believe, that to Him, and i realize that since He's God, i can't really guess what He's thinking, but...I believe that to Him, if he had made us where we automatically worshiped and loved him, that it would not be real love and that would be an anathema. Love has to be given freely and therefore, we have free will and all the troubles and sorrows it has caused.

i spoke with ken after the movie. he gave me a few points to consider...

I guess this just exacerbates my existing confusion on religion. Oh, don't get me wrong, I have most of the Basic Christian beliefs, the virgin birth, the resurrection, etc., but how can i trust religion, any religion, when men have perverted it to serves their purposes, to keep them in power, to make others believe things their way...
it makes me think.

i'm going to let the movie and these ideas percolate through my head for some time. it seems that i need to seek for God in other ways. Prayers to help me find my direction would be appreciated.

passing the time on friday night...


Which Rock Chick Are You?

jo ended up being tori amos. i'm so jealous. but i like bjork, too.

mousie
i got a new optical mouse at work! *does a happy dance*
no more cleaning the mouse for me! woo hoo!

to the dump!
dad's friend, marilyn, goes to florida to visit with her son, jay, and to go to the dump.
huh?
apparently, the dump is the rich folk's dump. every year they redecorate their houses because, God forbid anyone should visit their house and it look the same as last year. so, they just throw it all away: tables, sofas, etc. all sorts of stuff and it's barely used.
well, marilyn is going to florida again soon and she's hoping to bring back some major finds. i asked her to keep an eye out for a filing cabinet. i've discovered that i need one to organize my comic stuff and my finance stuff.
upon getting my request, marilyn commented, "just call me fred sanford." lol


addendum: 3-25-04 marilyn was not able to find a used filing cabinet. Ken and i may go flea marketing soon and chances are, we'll find one then.

bark bark
ken and i went to the mall this evening.
as we walked through the parking lot, a white pick-up truck passed us with one dude hanging at the window and barking as people, like a little yappy dog or something. he did it at every person the truck passed.
"yap yap! yap yap yap yap yap yap! yap!"

the following conversation ensued between ken and myself as the truck circled the lot:
me: what is he on?
ken: scooby snacks.
me: *laughs* that guy needs his rabies shot.
ken: nah, he just needs to be fixed.
me: *laughs* well, i think we at least should contact animal control...

i don't know if they guy was fulfilling a dare or just stoned but it was quite bizarre.
just thought i'd share that before i forgot it.

finally
i get the ok to distribute the new version of the employment application i designed to the other warehouses. what happens? conway warehouse finds two errors that spellcheck missed. 9.9 ah, well. such is life.
maybe now it's error-free. it does look much better than the old one, much, much better.

comic website is nearing completion. hopefully it'll go live before the end of march.

oh! and good news!
since i'm not going to draw a WCA comic this year i submitted a logo design to them and they liked it! you can see it on their site.
i'll also be posting links to the site on the proper day...

i'm not drawing a WCA comic because all last year, the majority of the few updates to Blue Canary that i made were filler. 8^P i'm going to work on real updates after this website thing and maybe next year i'll allow myself to participate.
same thing with group projects from the nice. i was part of the latest halloween comic, right? it was going to be a 3-day short story. then, i find out at last minute, i had to go to texarkana for work. i was without a computer or a scanner. at least i notified terrence and the others about this, but after i got home, i coulda put the last bit on there and finished the comic, but i was so embarrased that i would be updating a halloween comic after halloween. so, i thought, "hey, i finish a regular comic and upload that at the same time, so in the archives you'd see it," but i never got around to that either...i was ashammed for not working on my comic that i wouldn't start work on my comic and the cycle would repeat.

just like last year, when i kept saying i'd work on my website design but never did. then bry sent me two versions he had come up with and slowly, as the months passed...i started to get inspired. i've been working on the site for some time now...i'm proud of myself but i can't quit now. gotta pour that energy into drawing. the goal is to have 10 updates ready to go before i start the regular updating again.

ken tagged along with me on sunday when i met with jonathan stanley. we gave jon the full of our knowledge and advice on webcomics. his painted desert comic will be very good from what little i've seen. i hope he keeps working on it. i'm glad to see that he's thinking of starting one. 8^)

i'm gonna e-mail jo and see if she has any progress on the update blog design for Blue Canary. if she'd doesn't, that's ok. she's busy.

prayer request
i could use some prayers for my mother...she having transient ischemic attacks due to high blood pressure/cholesterol. she hadn't been taking her blood pressure meds due to the costs. she currently has about 7 drugs she is prescribed so it ads up quick with bills and insurance costs. she's also stressed since her work didn't take federal taxes out of her paychecks this year and stress causes more T.I.A.s. it's her birthday on monday, so my brother and i are giving her money this year to help her out financially and i'm getting her cake, the last one before she goes on a low cholestrol diet.

in the good news, i finally got a hold of jonathan stanley, fellow former herald cartoonist. he's trying to start up a webcomic. i'll be meeting with him on sunday morning to see what his fledgling strip looks like.

dreamweaver
i've been redesigning my blue canary site over the past two weeks! it's coming along nicely. jo's going to help me with designing a blog for it. i'm terrible at getting the blogger tags correct. i made some illustrator portraits of the main character and of me. they turned out great, but i don't think i'll be switching to an illustrator comic like scary-do-round.

ken's been taking 4 day weekends to use up the last of his vacation time. if he didn't, he's lose it at the end of the month.

i'm redesigning the job application at work. so far, it's looking good.
now, i just need some progress on the create!from projects...they go so slow and when i ask steve whether it needs any changes, i never hear from him. with that new computer system, it will not be a smooth transistion and i'm only trying to make sure there are no flaws on my end. but even when i asked for the monster invoice, i first got told that he'd do it and then he didn't. >8^(
heck, i even asked for other projects to work on he hasn't responded.
i'm just gonna work. nothing else i can do and if it all goes wonky, i will have washed my hands of it long ago. i have a feeling that i'd still get the blame, though. 9.9
otherwise, work is going well.

yeah! jo still blogs, even at grad school. 8^) hi jo!

Which HP Kid Are You?

which is appropreiate since my nose is always in a book. and i liked history in high school and college. 8^)