ken and i left for memphis too late to go to the chinese grocery stores. we had a rain and hail delay.
but we got to the airport ok and way ahead of time to pick up mom. i though she was supposed to come in at 6 and here she comes at 7 saying no we were on time...*shrugs*
i'm glad to see her however she is going to stir up some trouble on the house...

at times like this, i wish i could just turn my back on my parents and not look back. but mom wouldn't understand and she is the one i don't want to hurt. i'm not quite so sympathic to my dad. he's ok but he's done somethings in the past that keep me from sugarcoating his fatherly image. i know better.
i worry about my older brother, living with him still. i don't know what to do with him either. i had to move out eventually. i always knew i would. i feel bad that he's still there and when dad here's what mom's up to with the house...i'm afraid he'll take it out on my brother. not psyhically. never that way. dad just yells. he's temper is quick and it's over fast but i've never liked it when someone gets upset or yells. i think that is why. he's mellowed some in recent years but you never know. dagnabit! why does this have to happen? didn't my bro and i suffer enough through the divorce? it was bad at first but it got better. heck, they we're even civil to each other...and now this happens.
*ggggrrrr* i hate this whole mess. i don't care about that house anymore. i just want the whole ordeal over.
i told my parents that i will not pick sides in this mess. mom will respect that. i'm afraid that dad will oh so conveintly forget it. *sigh*
i have mail to pick up at dad's tonight. if he brings if up, i'll remind him of my stance. they are both my parents, like it or not.
when i was little at the beginning of the divorce i had to choose who to live with. i dont' think i really understood at the time. i just knew that i was dad's little spoiled brat. i usually got my way with dad while mom usually made me behave. so i chose. now, i am starting to regret that desicion some.
true, dad made more than mom so he could afford to take care of myself and my brother. and i did go every weekend to visit mom. there never was a custody battle. mom didn't want to do that to us, but she missed alot of my growing up. dad never showed to my school functions until my last two years of high school. it was always mom. she'd be there if no one else would.

i'm afraid to run away from this whole mess, but i'm also afraid to confront it. we'll see what happens in the end.

i like the rain we've been getting but after awhile, it starts to make me depressed.